Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Thing 56 Handle a Snake

Got to love pet stores don't you? They're full of really weird animals that you don't want to own, but really like looking at. I used to be particularly fond of the fish. We've got a little aquarium in the kitchen, got some cool fish in there, and Token Northy loves his fish. Today was a little chilling though - big giant angelfish, still alive, on its side getting eaten by several little catfish. It made me kind of nervous... Fish aren't supposed to be vicious little bastards. Who'd have thunk it?

In most pet stores there's also rabbits, gerbils and other animals, which make the place smell funny. I've never been fond of the smell to be honest. Not so in Underwater World, just fish and reptiles. And it was awesome. Also awesome in Underwater World was Sebastian, the dude who sold Token Northy his new rope fish, who I think is already plotting to take over the aquarium. Viva la revolucion and all that... That's Sebastian there behind Pixie Head in the photo below. Nice dude.
Pictured: Not slimy.

So, to get back to the point, I do tend to ramble off, sorry about that. The fish had already made me nervous, what with the eating each other alive. Then Sebastian tells us that it's feeding time for the Ball Python down the aisle, and this makes him a little bit vicious. Wanna have a try of holding him? Sure, pass the vicious python, I can't wait to hold him. Ahem.

Turns out the ball-python is only a year old or so. Small and wee but powerful. Non-venomous and grows to about 1.8 metres or so, that's about five feet tall. As Token Northy points out, that's almost as tall as me and I'm also short and powerful. For grub, the little champ will unhinge his own jaw, and eat an entire rat or mouse in one go. A rat is about three times wider than our little Python. Also, at his current tender age he sheds his skin once or twice a month, but that'll pass when he gets to about four feet long. The weapon of choice for this little fellow, now and as he grows is choking - he's a constrictor, and as a ball-python he likes to curl up and hide himself.

Another thing about my new amigo, aside from the 150 euro cost of buying him, is that he's not slimy. No matter what people kept telling me, I refused to believe that snakes weren't slimy. They're dry, and clean and entirely un-slimy. And I think they guy was more scared of me then I was of him. And I was a little scared of him, there's no point in saying otherwise.

Still... It was class. I'm glad of it, and if not for the asking price, which sadly enough, I can't exactly afford now, I'd have bought him. I'd have named him Kah...

You can never get enough Jungle Book references can you?
Pictured: Token Northy prepares to snack...


  1. That's not a snake... More like a slightly large legless lizard...

    Love an antipodean.

  2. Here's a suggestion for your list - check out the SeaSafari trips from Poolbeg, or from Dun Laoighre!

  3. Hi Dan

    Do you have an email address or phone no that you can be contacted on, i have a very interesting idea that involves you test driving a car.


  4. You have no idea how the crazy shit you are doing appears to be happening to me... a kid came up to my taxi and asked for some cash today... when I said no... he pulled out a snake and threatened to throw it on my lap... then I started to wind up the window... as ya do... and he hocked a mouthful of flem and was going to spit at me... then I clenched my fist and gave him the I will kick your bony ass from here to Mumbai... and he backed down...

  5. You look much better without the suicide bomber beard...

  6. Just noticed you have "followers"... Godboy