Thing 20 Ouija Board

It definitely doesn't work. No way. Ouija boards are namby pamby nonsense invented by superstitious hippies to scare even more superstitious hippies, and geeks at parties. It's pretty much what most people think before they try this stuff. It's what I was thinking too.

I'm never doing this thing again. Never. You couldn't pay me enough. In all likelihood it was someone else at the table either consciously or unconsciously moving the glass, but one way or another it moved and it wasn't me, and that's just about enough to freak me out.

Originally these things were sold as toys. That's right; entertain your kids by helping them to contact spirits from beyond the grave. It's perfect if they play it right before they go to bed... I wouldn't sell this crap to adults for fear that they get as rattled as I did.

We didn't have a proper medium, one with the beads in the hair, a bandana, long loopy earrings and a frilly dress. So we got Dr Frasier to do it. He wouldn't wear the frilly dress. Much and all as we tried to make him.

Initially nothing happened. You wont be surprised to know. But then the glass started moving around. Some of the words and letters didn't seem to make sense but the glass didn't stop moving. Pony Boy, Dr Frasier and Little Flower all swear that they weren't moving it. I can hold my hand up and say that I wasn't.

Logic says: Someone out of the four of us, without realising it, was involuntarily, through fear or superstition moving their fingers without knowing it. Or: someone moved it to fuck with everyone else's head.

The small part of my brain says: Holy shit... someone is trying to contact me from beyond the grave.

For anyone who's interested, our "spirit" was a Jewish man who has been dead for a hundred years or more. Never again... Freaky stuff...

P.S. Remember the fan mail to Senator David Norris? We got a reply...

Dear Daniel,

I really appreciate your kind and moving testimonial. I will certainly try
to live up to your opinion of me.
With best wishes
David Norris

Gotta love that man... What a legend.