Thursday, April 29, 2010

Thing 16 Buy Women's Underwear

That's the offending article up there. It's pink and it's frilly-ish. Token Northy thought it was a bum Thing to have on the list (classic pun), claiming it was entirely too easy. I disagree based on the fact that I'm an occasional closet prude. I'm admitting it now - sometimes I'm prudish. And on top of that, and you can feel free to disagree here, I think men should never, ever buy women's underwear. Regardless of whether you have a wife or girlfriend. It's only because we're crap at these things, and there's no way to do it without looking ridiculously sleazy. We know nothing about bra or cup sizes, and any man that does has questions to answer. We know what we like, but our only point of reference is seeing it on a woman, so how can we know if it's good, bad, tacky, flashy or any other adjective you're having yourself without seeing it on. So there's no way that it can be deemed appropriate for dudes to go shopping for women's underwear.

On top of this, there's the aforementioned prudishness, which rears its ugly head at the oddest of times and circumstances. I have no problem making a scene in public. I've no problem with partial public nudity. I can't look at the ladies section of a shop without blushing. And I mean scarlet blushing... it's a problem.

So I had to go to The Crescent. I figured that it being a Thursday night at 8pm, there'd be almost nobody there, and I could sneak into a clothes shop, grab the undies and dodge out. Tops three minutes. Problem Number 1: The place was wedged. I stopped outside a number of stores, looked guiltily in, and then spotted someone I knew in the foyer outside. I moved on. This happened like five times. I looked like some kind of escaped perv. It was horrendous.

I had to go in to Elvery sports and spend fifty euro on sportswear just so I could feel manly again. Thankfully (but also in a way, kind of not) I bumped into Drinking Teacher and See See. Cue much guffawing and laughing at my predicament. But with some backup, I was ready to hit Penny's. Oh yeah!!!

Smash and grab operation. Get in. Grab the undies. Pay. Get out. Problem Number 2: There was a massive queue. So I stood in line in Penny's with a pear of pink polka-dot lady undies for about ten minutes. A queue made entirely of women. Drinking Teacher and See See shouted from outside the queue and took photos. Honestly, there are cherries and tomatoes that aren't as red as I was...

But it was done. And now they're hanging in my closet... Soon to be burned I think....


  1. P.S. It's now been one hour and forty nine minutes without talking. Today's thing is difficult and annoying...

  2. I suggest that you add to the list to either (a) where them for a day (b) return them complaing that when you tried them on they weren't quite your size

    Just realised I'm going to be home for the back nine of the 366 things.. very exciting!!


  3. they look lovely on though lol ;P

  4. thing 17-try to wear wat u bought.....

  5. love my daily fix, keep up the blogs