Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Thing 288 Australia Day

When most people hear the word racism, Anti-Australian sentiment is not the first thing that pops into their heads. And rightly so. I don't think that there is a large amount of anti-Ozzie feeling out there. Nonetheless, if you walk around town in shorts, a vest and a short-sleeved shirt, pretending that you're about to go surfing and drinking cans of Fosters, I think it would be fair to call that racist. Basically it's just mocking Australians.

Turns out the joke's on me though. Because walking around in your shorts and flip-flops (or thongs as the say in Australia) in Ireland, in January is stupid beyond words. The Thief and I went for cake and tea, and I'm nearly sure the woman spent most of the day trying to get away from me, crossing roads and hiding her face. Because being seen with the man who's either clearly insane, or obviously stupid is nobody's idea of fun.
I watched Home and Away. I "threw shrimp on the barbie". Literally. I bought shrimp. I opened up our barbeque, I stood a reasonable distance away and I fired shrimp on to it. I didn't cook them, obviously. Just threw them. I drank Fosters and I visited my Irish based Australian friend Wombat. That's him up there in the photo. He was having an Australia Day party. That's a first for most people, I just like to drag the arse out of these Things, hence the reason that I spent all day looking like a clown.

I've got some Ozzie friends in Australia who are, thankfully, too far away from here to punch me in the face for mocking them (see you all for the wedding in October folks... you can form an orderly queue for punching then). And I've visited Australia for three weeks with Blond Boss back in 2009, so I think, somehow, without applying any logic, that I'm allowed to make fun of Ozzies... Don't think too deep into that one, just go with me on it.

I have to say, all messing aside, I think I love Australian culture. It's like American culture; a mish-mash of other countries' and nationalities mixed with some Aboriginal ideas and all melted together into a commonality that can only be called Australian. For example: In Leederville, Perth, WA, I went to a cafe and ordered a latte and a slice of cake (I do love me a slice of cake). I was on my own, so I sat down to read the paper. Lost track of time and fifteen minutes later realised I'd not gotten my cake or coffee. I went to the counter, not exactly angry, just a little miffed. The girl behind the counter smiled; "Aw yeih, I forgot about you..."

There was no "sorry". No free coffee. No guilt or embarrassment. If it happened in Ireland, there'd be a scene made. I told Band Man when I got back to his house and he laughed. Ya, that's typically Australian apparently. Too laid back to care, and either you slow down to their pace of life, or you'll get frustrated fast....

What a way to live. For all my taking the piss out of all things Australian, I like their style...

I don't like their fashion. Or their Vegemite... but that's a different story.

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